Alexa: Peter Gatien’s Bitter Protegé

If you do not know who Peter Gatien is, then you had best Google him right now before Alexa hears of your unbelievable ignorance. If you ask Alexa, his bitter protegé , “Who’s Peter Gatien?”, she is likely to pull out her switchblade. Silently, ominously. She might even check her lipstick in its glittery surface, just to freak you out. She probably wouldn’t cut you with it, though. She’s an heiress. Spent her childhood at boarding schools in Switzerland and France. Has never had to work a day of her life. She has financed some of Peter Gatien’s clubs, but only because she’s such a coke-whore that she won’t be let in to other clubs. She needs somewhere to go. Gatien thinks she’s “a trip”. “You’re a trip, Alexa,” he growls. She can’t tell if this is a compliment or not.

She’s bitter because she missed the late 70s and 80s. She wants to bring them back. Clubs used to be important. Club owners were personalities, notorious, envied, fucked. Those days are gone. Alexa wants to bring them back.

She likes to think of herself as dangerous. Her friends are rappers who have done hard time, drug-dealers from Jersey, porn stars and moguls, and bored heirs and heiresses like herself. She likes men better than women. She thinks most women are pretty silly.

She doesn’t think that she is silly. Not at all.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with Alexa’s eye.

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20 Responses to Alexa: Peter Gatien’s Bitter Protegé

  1. RTG says:

    Reminds me of the song Little Miss S by Edie Brickelle, which is of course about … that girl whose name I’m totally blanking on and no, the ‘S’ doesn’t help.

  2. Brendan says:

    Actin’ with a patch! Remember that Sheil? What was that? Blackie from General Hospital? Livin’ on a patch? This series is making my day and must be continued at all costs.

  3. red says:

    Bren – of COURSE I remember it!! I was torn between who this girl was – either she was related to “Patch” (the dude from that soap opera – One Life to LIve? No. Livin’ on a patch – hahahahaha) – but then I thought it would be funnier to bring Peter Gatien into it.

    I keep that patch around for Bloomsday purposes … nice to know I’m not just “livin’ on a patch”.

  4. nick says:

    i think she can be who she wants to be and do what she wants to do, if u dont like, u chould probably keep it to yourself and thats that….keep doin what ur doin Alexa

  5. nick says:

    i think she can be who she wants to be and do what she wants to do, if u dont like, u chould probably keep it to yourself and thats that….keep doin what ur doin Alexa

  6. Alexa says:

    Thanks, Nick! I will continue to be who I want to be. Gatien thinks I’m awesome, so the haters can go fuck themselves!

  7. Rob says:

    “There is absolutely nothing wrong with Alexa’s eye.”

    Which one?

    Alexa would never use a cigarette holder.

  8. Rob says:

    Oh, and excellent stuff, red. Love the second pic.

  9. red says:

    Rob –

    The joke is – that she’s wearing a patch for no reason. Unlike Peter Gatien – who lost his eye in a hockey injury.

  10. Rob says:

    Oh, that sailed right over my head. No idea who he was and the Google headers I came across didn’t mention it. That’s not a household name in Bush, LA.

  11. red says:

    Sadly I was trying to find a picture of Peter Gatien with the eyepatch – but couldn’t find one! He truly looked evil. Which is why I think he did it.

    Gatien still has a lot of support – but he was pretty much run out of town. interesting story, all around.

  12. red says:

    I think the movie Party Monster was about that whole world – the club scene in the 80s and 90s before the Guiliani crackdowns. I didn’t see it – but Gatien is a character in it, I believe.

  13. red says:

    Yup! Just checked it – Gatien is played by Dylan McDermott.

  14. red says:

    And you know – I don’t think he’s a household name really anywhere. He’s obscure even here – his heyday is long past. I just always remembered him, and remembered being fascinated by his flameout and the ugliness of the story around him … and so when I saw my eyepatch that was the first thing that came to mind.

    Apparently Gatien is alive and well and opening up a club in Toronto.

  15. Rob says:

    A whole world I know nothing about, red. There was a club in one of the opening scenes in Miami Vice (The fairly lousy 2006 movie) that showed one of those clubs with hundreds waiting in line while the “beautiful people” pulled up in their limos and walked right in. I wouldn’t get in even if I were inclined to wait in line.

  16. red says:

    hahaha Totally

    I see people standing in line to get into the new hot place and I seriously just don’t get it.

    I do wish I had gone to Limelight in its heyday – just so I could say that I went there. It was legendary.

    But clubs (and crowds, in general) are SO not my scene. They make me feel anxious.

  17. Payyourbill says:

    Peter Gatien is a CROOK, THIEF and a LIER.

  18. Payyourbills says:

    Peter and Alexandra are fucken fakes who thinks they are fucken bad but they are not fucken bad they are just leaches sucken other people dry from their life savings. these fuckers should be in prison instead of out ripping people off.

  19. red says:

    I feel like Borat right now. I’m punking everybody.

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